He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
