Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
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