Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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