i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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