pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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