Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
