cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
