I need help removing her.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
