Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
