i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
