Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
