You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
