he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
