Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
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