Dual....:-)
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
