it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
