she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
