at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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