All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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