And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
