it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
