I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
