He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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