That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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