Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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