there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
