I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
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