I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
