its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
