Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
my shit smells like andre
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
