was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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