So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
