Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
