Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
