It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
