why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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