Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
