It's like God shit irony all over that family
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Randomize