i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
