Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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