Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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