the new term for farting is butt boxing.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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