Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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