She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
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Do I have a choice?
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Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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