I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
