who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
