omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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