So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
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