Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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