At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
