What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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